My late husband was a hoarder. I would beg him to please at least store some things rather than having everything on display because when that happens, nothing is special. It got to the point that he pushed all of our friends and family away. We couldn’t have anybody over and it was incredibly embarrassing. Eventually, I started having friends over anyway. I thought maybe embarrassing him would be the way to go, but it backfired and I ended up being embarrassed.
My husband was also a narcissist I believe and hoarding was also a contributing factor in keeping my friends away and making sure I didn’t have any friends.
He didn’t want me to be supported by family or friends because he couldn’t control me if I had other influences in my life.
Also, nothing was mine even the things that he had bought for me. I had no privacy. I had one room that I had cleaned as a private peaceful place for myself, clean and arranged and organized. I put a lock on the door to keep him from putting things in it and to keep them from invading my privacy.
Two days later, I came home and he had changed the door knob. And had locked me out of my room.
I am so sorry you had to live like that…you are not alone. It’s such a helpless and hopeless feeling and I’m sure it was hard for you not to feel devalued and disrespected. You are so strong! 🩵
My late husband was a hoarder. I would beg him to please at least store some things rather than having everything on display because when that happens, nothing is special. It got to the point that he pushed all of our friends and family away. We couldn’t have anybody over and it was incredibly embarrassing. Eventually, I started having friends over anyway. I thought maybe embarrassing him would be the way to go, but it backfired and I ended up being embarrassed.
My husband was also a narcissist I believe and hoarding was also a contributing factor in keeping my friends away and making sure I didn’t have any friends.
He didn’t want me to be supported by family or friends because he couldn’t control me if I had other influences in my life.
Also, nothing was mine even the things that he had bought for me. I had no privacy. I had one room that I had cleaned as a private peaceful place for myself, clean and arranged and organized. I put a lock on the door to keep him from putting things in it and to keep them from invading my privacy.
Two days later, I came home and he had changed the door knob. And had locked me out of my room.
I am so sorry you had to live like that…you are not alone. It’s such a helpless and hopeless feeling and I’m sure it was hard for you not to feel devalued and disrespected. You are so strong! 🩵